Do You Know Jesus Christ?

They are all full-fledged Genin!

Boruto: Next Generations! Let me start by saying that while this show is not perfect, I am really starting to enjoy it. I do have some minor gripes with the show such as, how overpowered everyone is pre-Genin, or how light and bubbly the narrative has been thus far. But the series is just beginning and I am sure that those minor problems I have with it will clear up along the way. Also, how could you not like the show with all the homage it has paid to its predecessor: Sarada wants to be the next Hokage, the new team 7, and my favourite of all, the Sarada-Boruto kiss (be ready for them to be shipped hard!).

But all that aside, the past few episodes (the preparations for the final exam, the exam itself, and the graduation) have been my favourite so far. Up to this point Boruto has been living in its own bubble of niceness and the good guy always wins without any real troubles, but leave it to Kakashi-san to give Boruto a wake up call.

In my own life, graduation has also been on my mind because I intend to graduate this school year (June 2018). And one line from Kakashi really stood out to me (watch the video!).

I believe that upon graduating from a post-secondary school many students (or I guess ex-students) don't have or struggle to come up with a clear direction for their lives. One of my favourite questions to receive from people is, "what is the plan after school?" The reason I like this question so much is because it forces me to reaffirm my plans moving forward. It is almost as if in telling others, I am psychologically being held accountable to my plans. So if you are studying/graduating soon, I urge you to think about "what is the plan after school?"

In addition to graduating school this year, I will be "graduating" from CFC-Youth. So adios amigos! From here on, I will be moving into SFC completely and I am so excited for it!

Slowly with each graduation in our lives we start to take our lives more and more into our own hands; the way we live our lives is more about our choices than living underneath someone else's. So it is important that we start thinking about what we will do with what is for most students, the last "technical" graduation of their lives. 

For myself, I intend to work towards becoming a full time teacher in a high school. This means cleaning up resumes, writing cover letters, creating portfolios, and applying to boards. At first, I'll be supply teaching, so I'll probably keep my part-time job at Kumon. Over time I hope to move up the supply list, get onto the long term occasional list, and then get a full time position. This is a brief overview of my plan moving forward. There aren't too many details listed out here because I don't want to bore you with my life (well actually, lol I don't have too many more details beyond this haha). But if you're a graduating student, please start thinking about what comes next!

But I think this idea of thinking about what comes next is a thought process we must apply to more than just milestones in our lives: graduating school, moving on from youth ministry, etc. I think we need to approach life with this mind set: "what comes after life?" For Catholics the answer is simple, eternal life (or maybe for most of us, purgatory then eternal life) (note, the answer is simple, but the execution is terribly hard). But do we take the time daily to consider what this answer means; how it affects our daily lives; what are the implications and consequences of having such a dream to aspire towards. I think in this regard, most of us fall way short of the mark. 

The dream of being Hokage is alive and well

To say that after life, we will have eternal life means that God has welcomed us, with arms spread wide, into heaven, and that in response to that welcome, we have come to fully embrace him. If this is the goal, then I want to encourage you all to consider one of my favourite quotes from one of my favourite speakers (lol I've actually only listened to one of his talks):

"Do you know Jesus Christ? That's the most important thing you'll ever answer because to know Jesus Christ is to have everlasting life. There's nothing more important than to know Jesus Christ" 
-Father Larry Richards

So I ask you now, do you know Jesus Christ? And if you do know Him, what does that mean? Does it mean that in knowing Him, you have come to love Him? If you love Jesus, can you prove it by the people whom you love? "And this commandment we have from him, that he who loves God should love his brother also." (1 John 4: 21)

Essentially what it comes down to is, what we do here on earth is important; "it decides our eternity" (Father Larry Richards). "So faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead" (James 2:17). Our faith and knowing and loving who Jesus is moves us; it compels us to action. 

A new year is beginning and as has become tradition for many, it is a time to make new resolutions: to become more healthy, to pray more, to study harder, etc. This time as, the year winds down and new one begins, I urge you to re-examine your faith life and consider how you will act on your faith this year. Let your relationship with Jesus Christ shine through to all those you meet:

"By this they will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." -John 13:35

...And with that, may God be praised!

P.S. Bonus comic strip 'cause it was pretty funny

"A Father's Hope, A Mother's Love"

This post is about... Naruto Shippuden episode 297. I remember when I first watched this, not only did I get the feels, but I got eyes full of tear- I mean water... you know, cuz my eyes got dry and stuff.

This was me all episode long

But aside from getting really emotional, I was also affirmed of something: we live in a world that is starved of God, that in fact, there are signs in every corner of world of a longing for God.

This episode of Naruto displayed for many to see, a message that is Catholic in its very nature: a glimpse of what Marian love is like.

Ever have issues receiving the word of God in your life? You feel like God the Father has something to say to you and you can't seem to hear or get the message? Or perhaps, you want Him to say something about your life and He seems silent? In a way, it feels like He's detached from us, that He doesn't care for whatever may be going on in our lives. This is not true, far from it: "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope" Jeremiah 29:11. But despite reading, knowing, and even experiencing this truth, we fall wayward and question God's plan for our lives. 

If this is our experience with our Heavenly Father, then how often must we experience an even worse brokenness with our human parents? We know that they desire good for us, but yet in their humanity, fall far short of this great God-given desire. Gaara, the main character of this particular episode, experiences, in full, the brokenness of human relationships.

So for those of you that don't follow the series and insist on still reading this post, I will give a brief summary in hopes that this sufficiently prepares you for the rest of the post (and well, I guess those that do follow the series, you can read it also) . Gaara grew up as the youngest of three siblings, but despite that, grew up in complete loneliness. He was a human experiment. His village and the village leader, the Kazekage, his father, tried to seal a powerful beast inside of him in hopes that their village could retain this great power for themselves. Everyone up until then that had this great beast sealed within them would go mad and rampant on the village, killing many. Gaara was no different. As a child he would lose control of himself and kill villagers. Seeing that their experiment with Gaara had failed, Gaara's father tried to kill him several times in order to keep the village safe (if you think you got issues with your Heavenly Father, well...). He failed each time (well, duh Alphonse, Gaara lived up until this point). Unable to kill Gaara, he was kept as a secret weapon; a human weapon for the village. He lived in solitude and isolation. Everyone around him was scared of him. No one cared for him.

Side tangent, I just lied to you, there was one that did care for him: his uncle, Yashamaru. But in a tragic "test" of Gaara's ability to control himself and the powers sealed within him, Gaara ended up killing Yashamaru. Talk about a tragic life, no one loves you except one person, and you end up killing that one person.

But Gaara didn't hang his head low (well actually, for a time he did, I guess). TLDR; Naruto becomes his first authentic friend and from there Gaara straightens out his life. He grows up to become a great shinobi. In fact, he becomes the fifth Kazekage, that is, the recognized leader of his village.

But through all of this, there is one person we have yet to mention: Karura, Gaara's mother. Where was she during all his pain and loneliness? Well, she died right after child birth. Gaara loved her very much. He treasured her, at least up until that aforementioned "test" involving Yashamura. Gaara was lied to, and told that his mother did not love him. This left Gaara devastated and closed his heart completely. 

But despite her absence, she has a vital part to play in Gaara's story. In fact (this is slowly becoming one of my more used lines), it is through her that we can come to learn and experience a glimpses of what Marian love is like.


1. Mama Mary is our protector.

Gaara's main power is to manipulate sand. He can harden and soften it. Use it for offence and for defence. This power is mainly known for its defensive prowess: "absolute defence". One may think that this is a power that Gaara received from having the powerful beast sealed within him (that's a logical assumption since the power is OP and the beast is OP). But, in fact, this is a power that Gaara receives from his mother.

Throughout the fight with his father (TLDR; Gaara's father was reanimated/"resurrected"), it is revealed that through this power, his mother is always protecting him.

If you needed more proof, the sand even takes on the shape and form of his mother throughout this fight. This kind of reliable and strong protection that Karura gives to Gaara is what we can expect from our Mother Mary.

We know that through the command of our Lord Jesus, Mary is our mother: "Then he said to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his own home" John 19:27. As such, we know that she loves us dearly, and as any mother would do, she will protect us. We also know that as Mother of God, she is filled with grace: “Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with you!” Luke 1:28. And through this grace, she has power: "I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel” Genesis 3:15. As such, demons and devils fear her and under her mantle of protection we need not fear anything.

2. Through Mary we are brought closer to God


There's a flashback in this episode where Yashamura and Gaara speak about wounds and healing. Yashamura explains to Gaara that physical wounds are easy to notice. Blood or bruising appears, but given time, these wounds heal on their own. They heal even faster if you apply medicine to them. Then Yashamura explains to Gaara, wounds of the heart are much more troublesome. Given time, they may never heal. In fact, there is only one cure for them, love (*snap* *snap*).

How do I get me some love?

Despite lying to him, Gaara's father reveals to Gaara in this episode that his mother loved him. Then Gaara has a flashback about Yashamura telling him how his mother loved him. Gaara begins to realize that this power he received from her is a symbol of her love. That this protection is her embrace of love. Gaara's father then begins to pour out his heart to Gaara. In a spirit of repentance, he admits that he was the one who took away everything from him: life, friends, family, community. He also gives great insight, that through Karura's great love for Gaara, he has been given an opportunity at all these things. Her belief in Gaara and protection of him, propelled him to where he is.

From this episode comes one of my favourite lines in the whole series,"Thanks to her, for the first time, I received medicine [love] from my father."

And isn't it true?! That through our mother we are able to receive our medicine of the heart from our Father. Now, Gaara's father is completely short of our Heavenly Father, but it is no lie that we at one point lived in such division from our Father. It took a mother's yes to bring us closer to God. Because of Jesus through Mary, the gates of heaven were opened up to humanity! And so, we can receive medicine to heal the deepest wound of our hearts: separation from God.

I believe we live in a starving society. One that hungers and thirsts for the love of God. If we just look around us, we see the signs littered all over; a world that deeply desires the love of God. I also believe that the world intrinsically knows of this longing, that this is the reason we see it spill out and over into our literature. In all kinds of literature we can see the love of God because literature is a expression of the heart, and what greater thing can the heart express than love for God?

"In my distress I called upon the Lord;  to my God I cried for help." Psalm 18:6

... And with that, may God be praised!

Mission Ready Relationships

So I recently finished watching Descendants of the Sun (a Korean drama) and man.... my heart. In past posts, I have shared about how anime has influenced my life and furthermore, how I have come to encounter God through this medium. But I found out that I can also experience God through Korean dramas (I mean they are about love, and God is love... so duh, Alphonse). So here goes!

Prepare yourself, after this picture
there will only be headshots of two good-looking people...

Being a young man, my vocation is one of the thoughts that is consistently at the fore front of my mind: Am I gonna get married? When will I get married? Should I go to a Come and See? How will I serve God for the rest of my life? How am I being called to spend my life? These are very big questions indeed. Personally, I desire to be married (and I'm thoroughly convinced I will be married). So much to the point (and those who know me personally can verify), that I "fight" with God about this: "marriage is the only vocation for me". Putting my close-mindedness aside, I've been able to learn a lot about what I desire out of a marriage and what I desire for my future wife ('cause it's gonna happen) and our future family.

So in this series the two main leads are a Korean Soldier, Captain Yoo Shi Jin and a Doctor, Dr. Kang Mo Yeon. And like with any other Korean Drama, they are the cutest couple ever. They have their cute banter, sassy remarks, date nights, over the top drama, near death experiences ('cause you know, that's a staple for any couple... please no, not me) (they're also getting married in real life!! =O <3).

One of the things that really stood out at me is how they feel about each other's missions. Back in episode 1, Shi Jin states his mission: "My principle is that I must protect beautiful women, seniors, and children."

But on a serious note, he tells her his mission: "My fellow soldiers and I do what we do because it's something someone should do and this is how we protect my family, your family, and everyone they love. We do this to protect the freedom and peace of the people in this country." (Episode 2). To which Mo Yeon responds, "I'm a doctor. I believe in the dignity of life and there's no value or ideology that surpasses that." In addition to falling in love with each other, Shi Jin and Mo Yeon show that these missions are an integral part of their relationship and why they fell for each other.

But it wasn't always like that; love is not always so easy and straightforward (especially in a K drama). They went through doubts. I mean, heck, in episode 2 Mo Yeon says, "this isn't what I expected." For Shi Jin there were times where he wondered about Mo Yeon's resolve to stick to her oath, like in episode 3 after she tells him that she doesn't operate anymore and she is more concerned about her career. After she misdiagnoses a child and Shi Jin corrects her, he says, "You believed in the dignity of life and no value that surpasses that. What I meant is that you seemed like a different person from the one I knew." (Episode 3).

Mo Yeon's doubts about Shi Jin were much more explicit. We see it start from the first two episodes. She gets stood up twice and when they can finally have their first date together she can't even get answers about where he went, who he is, or what he does. Later on in the conversation she talks about how his job is to "protect lives while killing" (Episode 2) (talk about a stark contrast from her job to save lives). Throughout the show she asks the same questions but because he can't disclose his work to her, he ends up lying to her on many accounts. She is trying to piece together who this man in front of her is. 

Things take an interesting turn in episodes 11 and 12 when (SPOILER ALERT) she is abducted by David Argus. While she is abducted, he whispers into her ear: "Big Boss. He's smart, funny, and mysterious. But he has a lot of secrets. He'll disappear from time to time and be hard to contact. And then one day, he'll never come back". And even though (spoilers!) everything ends up well, her doubts and fears and anxieties about him spill over when they finally get a chance to talk: "I have a feeling that you lie to me quite often."

Get ready, here it comes!

"How many more lies have you told me so far because you didn't want to worry me? ... Now I understand. The lies that you've told me, they aren't the kind of lies I can tell you to come clean with and threaten to break up with you if you don't. Behind your lies someone's life is at stake, and politics and diplomacy are involved, and countries react. You made jokes to hide the things that you couldn't tell me. To hide the things that you can't tell me you'll keep making silly jokes and I won't be able to trust you. And eventually, there'll be nothing to talk about between us... I trust you, but I can't tell those things to someone who stops bullets with his own body... Im not sure if you're a man I can handle." (Episode 12)

(breath, breath Alphonse, breath)

Mo Yeon came face to face with all her doubts, worries, and fears of being with Shi Jin all because she was having trouble figuring out if Shi Jin, with his mission, was a good fit for her and vice-versa.

Lol sorry I made that quite anticlimactic

Well, later on in the episode everything ends up fine, they make up, and she decides to accept him and his mission despite being left out of the loop. It is in getting to know each other, to trust each other, that they overcome their doubts about each other. The show does a great job of showing how much effort and time it can take to get to know someone and learn about what they really stand for. Shi Jin and Mo Yeon really struggle and fight for their relationship. They learn to love each other and to embrace the mission the other holds so dear.

Their decisions to accept and embrace each other for who they are and what their missions are isn't just a bunch of flowery promises and nice words. It actually meant supporting each other. An example of Shi Jin supporting Mo Yeon was when he told her to treat David Argus after he had shot him. After getting shot, David started his psychological attack on Mo Yeon by reminding her that she is a doctor and as a doctor she should treat his wound. She felt conflicted, her mission calls her to save people, but should she save a man who is a child trafficker and could potentially harm them. Shi Jin seeing her in distress steps in and supports her. He tells her to uphold her mission, to treat David and keep her integrity in tact. At the same time, he assures her that he will see to everyone's safety.

While there weren't any moments where you see Mo Yeon telling Shi Jin to go "shoot this guy to protect others" or anything like that, we know that she deeply cared for his mission. In episode 15 Mo Yeon asks questions to the military officers about Shi Jin's death (oops... I kinda just said it without warning, sorry if I spoiled it!).  "Did his death save other lives? Did his death keep peace in a certain area? Did his death benefit his country?"

This was such a heart-breaking scene

Despite feeling deeply hurt, lost, sad, confused, and everything else, she decided she wanted to know if Shi Jin could live out his mission. His mission was important to her and she supported him in that.

Not only did they support each other in their missions, they fulfilled their missions in a complementary way to each other's. Their missions were not the same but they found ways to bring them together and to work together. One example is in episode 4 when Mo Yeon and the medical team perform surgery on the Uruk president. "As of now, protecting the medical team and the patient is our priority." He protects while she saves. Another example is the response to the earthquake. Shi Jin and the soldiers worked to clear out dangerous routes so that Mo Yeon and the medical team could get to injured workers and treat them.

While they are a really cute couple (in the drama and in real life!), the way they support and complement each other's mission makes their relationship beautiful. Isn't this one of the staples of a Christian marriage? Spouses are called to help each other get to heaven. To spend our lives here on earth well so that we may spend eternity with God. But how do you do that? You have to, day in and day out, help your spouse become the best version of himself or herself. You do that by learning about who they are and what they stand for. Learn about their mission statement and help them achieve that.

To my single friends desiring to pursue the vocation of marriage, maybe you're tired of being single (I feel you on that one), but don't waste this precious time that is given to you. Discover and carve out your mission. Develop a relationship with God so that you can learn how best to serve Him with your life. Spend time preparing yourself so that your spouse can readily support you in your mission and you can support your spouse in their's. I don't know about you, but I want to be with someone who sees their career as more than a passion but as a way of loving, as a way of serving; someone who sees their career as a God-given vocation. Use this time and become this kind of attractive. Holiness is definitely attractive.

To my friends in a relationship (lol this is shorter 'cause I'm not in this stage of life), get to know each other. Learn each other's mission statements. Learn how you can support and guide each other. Encourage each other. Pick each other up. This is an exciting time, but it is an important time where you must learn to love; where you learn that loving your significant other means getting them to heaven, no matter the cost.

To my married friends (I'm definitely not here yet though, so bear with me), you've already learned that loving them means getting them to heaven, this is the time where you act on that. Build a family that has a mission dedicated to the Lord. Be united in serving each other and the Lord. Not only do you need to get you and your spouse to heaven, you need to get your family to heaven!

We were made to love; we were made for love; we were made from love. Secular society understands that love is beautiful, but sometimes forgets what it takes to love. It's not always easy, actually, it's really hard. You have to learn to trust each other and more than that you have to learn to support each other. In fact, this is impossible on our own, so stay rooted in God always!

"as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord"

-Joshua 24:15

... And with that may God be praised!

Envy, The Big Green Monster

So it has actually been a while since I finished Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood and I wanted to do one final post. If you recall, in my last post I said briefly that I would like to talk about the homunculus and their names. I won't talk about all of them, but rather I will focus on one.

The thing that makes the homunculus so interesting is that you know that these characters are the bad guys and yet by the time that they start dying you can't help but feel something for them. Why is that? Is there is some sort of goodness in sin (if you didn't know, the homunculus are named after the seven deadly sins). No, far from it. Sin is that which separates us from God, who is the source of all goodness; it is bad! The reason that the deaths of these homunculus seem so tragic is because sin itself is tragic. It is often said that sin is the distortion of love; that it actually stems from a place of good will and just misses the mark. We desire that which is good but in our brokenness are not able to pursue goodness the way we ought to. It is important to understand this because in understanding this we are able to see how sin can be undone in our lives.

The homunculus I want to examine in this post is Envy. Oh Envy, how you were so annoying throughout the show (you killed Hughes 😡), yet by the end I could not help but feel pity for you. I think Ed's reaction to envy in the end is exactly how I felt about him as a character, but we'll get to that after.

Let's start with, what is envy? Envy is (as a noun) a feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else's possessions, qualities, or luck; or (as a verb) the desire to have a quality, possession, or other desirable attribute belonging to someone else (Thanks Google!). Why would we want something that belongs to someone else? Because it is a good thing and we are meant to have good things. We are often jealous of the good things other people have because we desire good things for ourselves. But envy does not desire out of utility or even sentimental value, it simply wants out of spite (see, the desire for good that becomes distorted). It says straight to the face of God, I deserve all good things and You should be giving them to me. It is in trying to accumulate, that the envious one tries to fill the hole in their heart. This is dangerous because this attitude makes us think that we can, and should, make God serve us all good things on a silver platter.

Now wait, doesn't this sound like another sin: Greed? It does and it doesn't. Greed also seeks to collect but comes out of a different place of the heart. Greed acknowledges the longing of the heart to love God but it confuses the love of God for the love of things. Greed mixes up the creator for the created. Greed, in fact, is more a problem of prioritizing which or who should be loved first and most. Now does this mean that the two can never overlap? No, of course they can; sin begets sin. This is to say, however, there are differences, even subtle ones, between envy and greed.

Now, back to envy. We spoke about what envy is, but what kind of devastating effects does it bring with it? Envy teaches us to focus on others in a negative way. Also, envy blinds us to our own faults. Why? Let's take a look at the character Envy. He is actually responsible for two very big deaths in the show (here's your spoiler warning, but seriously, just watch the show if you haven't yet).

The first person that Envy kills (in historical order) is the Ishvalan child, and that leads to the extermination of the Ishvalans and eventually, the rise in notoriety of Scar. As a result of being robbed of all that he has, Scar sets out on a quest of revenge against all Armestrians, especially state alchemists.

The second person that Envy kills is Maes Hughes (queue the water works). What did this result in? Well from Envy's point of view, Colonel Mustang also became hell bent on revenge, to the point he "murdered" Lieutenant Maria Ross. Later on we also see the accumulation of hatred in Mustang's heart.

(It is important to note that I am now comparing the effect Envy the character has on other characters to the effect envy as a sin has on us personally. In saying that, it does not mean that I am looking at characters like Scar and Mustang as characters suffering from the sin of envy but from the character Envy.)

Envy teaches us to focus on others in a negative way...

Now what do these two murders (that Envy committed) have in common? They resulted in the the brokenness of others. And actually, as we said before, as sin begets sin, their brokenness leads them to lose who they are and stray away from the right path.

For Scar, he became obsessed with avenging his own people. He accused a whole race of people because of the deceptions of the homunculi. It did not matter to him that Edward is a young state alchemist who did not participate in the war (because he was young and not yet a state alchemist). Scar still wanted to kill him.

Mustang also became obsessed with revenge. One of Mustang's goals throughout the series is to find Hughes' killer (we see this as he asks Lust upon meeting her for the first time who is Hughes' killer).

Mustang vs. Lust

But we really see the effects of such hurt manifested in his encounter with envy. Mustang begins losing himself to rage and hatred to the point that his friends actually have to intervene and prevent him from taking out their enemy. And even at this point, he threatens to raise arms against them demanding that they step aside and let him get his revenge. His friends recognized at that time that Mustang was going down a dark path where he would have no hopes of healing the deep pain he felt over losing his close friend.

Whoa he looks so dark

But why did Envy do these things? We learn at envy's time of death, he only desired to have the good things that humans had: relationships, love, peace, family. It is in wanting these things Envy became ok with trying to forcibly take them away from others. Envy is the sower of conflict.

The irony, he who demeaned humans was jealous of humans

Envy blinds us to our own faults...

When we fail to see our own faults, we either do one of two things: we elevate ourselves to a higher status or we degrade others to a lower status. Envy runs a much deeper psychological path. If we actually look at the character Envy and think about it, we might (and should) be deeply concerned. At every turn, he tries to turn others against each other. For example, when Envy was captured just before dying, he attempts to escape by reminding everyone of their distaste for each other (which he caused in the first place) so as to sow the seeds of conflict amongst them.

Envy laughs at the pains and hurts of others. He rejoices in the difficulties of others. He condemns and belittles others for struggling. And as sin begets sin, we see these psychological symptoms appear in Scar and Mustang as well. The envious one loses all care and love for his neighbour.

Overcoming envy...

So how do we defeat envy? Let's take a look at the great transformation of Scar! When we first meet Scar, he is a cold and heartless killer. But there are instances where we begin to see how the virtue of understanding undoes the knots in his heart. The very first example of humanness that Scar shows, is towards Nina (I'm so sorry for bringing this up). He says that he killed her out of mercy. Scar recognized that another was in pain and desired to respond (no matter how incorrect that was, especially from a Catholic perspective. This is like a whole other post on euthanasia and "mercy-killing", so not here guys). Later on in the series, he encounters Winry and finds out she is the daughter of the doctors who saved his life (and whom he killed). Because he understands the pain he inflicted upon her, he relinquishes to her the right to kill him (again, a bit off, but we're getting somewhere). 

But we really start to see Scar open up as more people come to understand him (the other way around now). When he starts having companions who know his story and still choose to journey with him (Yoki, May Chang, and Marcoh). One key person that he encounters who probably understands him the best is Miles. Miles is also an Ishvalan, but instead of choosing the path Scar chose, he tells him that he chose a different path: to change the country from within as opposed to subjecting it to the same pain that was inflicted upon him. This really sticks with Scar and we begin to see his transformation and freedom from Envy's grasp over him.

For Mustang we see his slow descent into the depths of hatred. Beginning with Mustang's "murder" of Maria Ross, then the provocations in his fight with Lust, these times make it seem like Mustang's fire of hatred is tepid at best. But when we come to his final fight with Envy we see that he has been festering this tepid flame into a monstrous fire of hatred. In that fight with Envy, it was Riza, Ed, and Scar that brought him back from going dark the path of hatred; they did not let him kill Envy even though he had journeyed so far just to exact revenge on Hughes' killer.

Ouuu, Riza, tell it like it is!

They stopped him by showing him they understood he was hurting, but by pointing out that this path would not bringing healing for his hurt. They reminded him of his dreams and aspirations, and how this would negatively affect those. They showed him they were there to understand him and to support him.

Well then, since Mustang didn't kill Envy, you must be wondering "how does Envy die in the show"? (spoilers!) He commits suicide. Why? Because in his last moments he feels so ashamed that someone else could understand the hole in his heart.

It is understanding and empathy that undoes the knots of the heart and defeats envy. When someone reaches out to know us and journey with us, envy fades away because the hole in the heart is filled with love.

Envy is dangerous. Often it turns us against each other and causes us to break what Jesus instructs us as the second most important commandment: "And a second is like it, You shall love your neighbour as yourself" (Matthew 22: 39). So when we encounter envy in ourselves, bring it to light, let God and your brothers and sisters be your source of healing: "Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming; but who can stand before jealousy? Better is open rebuke than hidden love" Proverbs 27:4. And when we are met by envy in our brothers and sisters, do not be quick to judge or dismiss, but rather, seek to understand: "He who is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly. A tranquil mind gives life to the flesh, but passion makes the bones rot" Proverbs 14:29-30.

...And with that, may God be praised!

Episode 20

You might be wondering, "why is this post called 'Episode 20'?" Well, I was watching Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood recently and finished episode 20; it was so good that I felt that this episode alone warranted a post. So let's dive into things!

*Disclaimer: this post makes more sense if you have seen the show. You are more than welcome to continue reading past this point if you haven't but I will not take any responsibility if you feel that this awesome and worthwhile anime was spoiled for you. You have been warned.

The title alone gives me goosebumps...

Today, I want to speak to you a bit about spiritual baggage. Ever have that feeling that you have baggage in your spiritual life that you have hidden away: buried deep in the basement or hidden away in a box in the attic of your heart? It might be a habitual sin, it might be a past hurt, whatever it is that you're hiding, God cares about it and He cares about you.

But before I get to that, let me set the table for what I would like to impart upon you. In the Catholic Christian's spiritual life we acknowledge the existence of two fathers: God, the Father Almighty; and Satan, the father of lies. And, oh look, there are two father-like figures in FMA Brotherhood. It also just happens, that one father is the father of Ed and Al, our main protagonists, and the other is father to the homunculi (who are, btw, named after the seven deadly sins 😲. There is plenty I want to say about the father of the homunculi and their corresponding sin-names, but this is not the post where I will do that (stay tuned in the future for that!) ).

I want to first talk about Hohenheim, the father of Ed and Al. In particular, I want to examine the love that he has for his sons, and how that parallels the love that God has for us. So let me give you some backstory on Hohenheim (don't worry, I will try to avoid major spoilers if you still haven't watched it (which if you haven't, I still do not understand why not) ). Hohenheim is the father of Ed and Al, but he was not present in their lives growing up. While Ed and Al were very young, Hohenheim left them and his wife behind. Even when his wife passed away, he did not return. He did not return home until... episode 20, lol. As a result, Ed grew up not only very distant from him, but actually resenting him: blaming him for his mother's passing and bearing a grudge against him for all the subsequent misfortunes (talk about a broken relationship).

Whenever we have father figures in a show, I recommend that you listen closely because I find that what they say closely resembles the words that we would hear from our Heavenly Father (one of my favourites is Gandalf from LOTR, but let's save that for another time). So what is the topic of conversation between Hohenheim and Ed after all these years?

Oh...

"I heard from Pinako, about you performing human transmutation." Dang... he didn't waste any time mincing words. Straight to the deepest and darkest secret Ed has. Oh, but there's more! As the conversation continues, Hohenheim asks Ed about why he burned down his house (which I will leave to you to think about the spiritual significance of). Ed's reply is, "We did it to show our resolve."

Ouuu! Say it like it is!

"No you didn't. You didn't want to look at it. You wanted to escape from your unpleasant memories. You wanted to hide the traces of what you'd committed... Just like a child, hiding the sheets when he wets the bed, you ran away Edward."

Edward! 😭

Could he say words that are more cut throat and to the point than that, and after not seeing him for years to boot (at least he's honest)? I'm sure in your faith walk you have felt these same kind of "hurtful words" coming from God. Or, it may be the case that you are hearing these words right now. But, why? Why say something so cruel. You are supposed to be my loving Father, that means you're not supposed to be mean to me, or hurt me. Wrong! He does this because He loves!

If He did not chastise us for the times we refuse to do what we need to, what kind of love would that be? Wouldn't He just be watching us head down a road to self-destruction, a road farther away from Him? He loves us so much that He does not want us to run away from Him. He would gladly trade a temporary hurt for eternity with you.

But Alphonse, why does it hurt so much? This is the natural consequence of sin and the father of lies. When we sin, we have done that which is in direct opposition to God's will, to love itself. We were made to love, and so it is easy to understand why it hurts when we commit sin. But why does it continue to hurt when we hide away our sin and then bring it to light? Don't we hide them away so it won't hurt us? You know, out of sight, out of mind? Well, it is the father of lies who rubs salt into our wounds and sometimes, further opens our wounds. Sin leaves us wounded, but the father of lies tells us that our wounds are shameful, that we must hide them away. Rather than ever showing God and letting Him heal us, we hide it away saying, "God this part of me is not worthy of You." As a result, we feel shame and humiliation for our sin and in hiding it, we allow these feelings to grow and take root in our hearts: we run away. The Father, in good will and out of love, brings our sins to light; He calls us to face our fears and hurts.

1. We need to face our problems - Sometimes, we are like Ed and say that we have hidden away our sins and hurts "to show our resolve." God calls us out on our bluff. What we really want is "to run away." Things will not get better if we continue "to show our resolve" by running away, in fact, things will get worse... much worse. But worry not, God wants us to be courageous, and...
2. We are not alone! - We have a spiritual family who, when it feels like God is not there, are with us. For Ed, Pinako was there. Not only was she there to console him, but she got into the trenches to dig up his past with him (quite literally lol). When we feel the absence of God (or when we force Him to be absent), we need to acknowledge that we still have our spiritual family, and most importantly, that we still have our Mother, Mary, who will not leave us. She is there to help us shoulder our burdens and to get into the pit with us to dig up our past sins and hurts. 



Literally in the trenches to dig up his past...

3. Our blessings are not our own - Maybe you have felt the wonders of healing in your life in some way or another. It could be through reconciliation with a friend, the kind words of someone else, etc. The point is that after we face the darkness and fears that bog us down, God begins to heal us and we feel good because of it. But that's actually not the best part. The best part is that everyone can participate in the joy that comes from this healing. I won't spoil what happens for Ed when he digs up his past, but I will say that he begins to find healing. But it didn't stop there, Alphonse (not me, Alphonse Elric) also found healing and closure from the news (but Alphonse, me, did feel overjoyed to tears by this). Pinako and Winry felt happiness for Ed and Al. Upon sharing their findings with Izumi, their alchemy teacher, she also found healing. And because she found healing, her husband also felt great joy. The blessings that come from our healing actually aren't only meant for ourselves, they are meant for everyone to experience. 

Now, for Ed, this whole thing happened within a 20 minute episode of an anime. Our own healing will not be nearly as short (if only). In fact, it may take days, months, or even years. Don't be afraid to embark on this journey. Whatever is holding you down in the depths of your heart is worth confronting. You are worth the walk on the road to spiritual freedom and liberty. You are also not alone in this walk, we all must take on this walk. Pray for clarity and be brave in the face of your fears.

"Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

-Philippians 4:6

...And with that may God be praised!

The Importance of Community

Ever wonder why we rewatch some of our favourite movies or reread some of our favourite books? The places never change, the characters are still the same, and to top it off you already know what is going to happen. So why? Well, often when we revisit these movies, shows, books, etc. it is not what is before us that is changing, it is us that is changing. What I mean is that the reason that we enjoy these things when we revisit them is because we ourselves have grown a little more since the last time we saw it; life has done its wonders and bestowed us with a new set of "eyes". In other words, the way we see things is now different (the plain and simple way of saying it without all the fancy words and stuff).

Why is this important? Well personally, I believe that in order for entertainment (movies, video games, etc.) to not be considered a waste of time it has to be purposeful: it makes you think critically, you learn something new, you apply lessons you've learnt, etc. How can you make reliving a piece of literature meaningful? You have to look at it differently. You have to look at it intently. You have to look at it with the firm determination of seeing something that is there, that you didn't see before. Stories are beautiful because they are an expression of humanity. But what we sometimes forget is that stories are also made beautiful by the depth and richness of quality that they contain. If something is worth revisiting, it is worth looking at in a different way.

So now that I have set the table, I would like to share with you my experiences of a show that I am rewatching: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood. FMAB is my favourite anime and I usually do an annual rewatch of this anime since like 2011 (you must be asking whether or not I must've absorbed everything there is to know in this show, the answer is, surprisingly, no I have not). Now I just started my rewatch of this show, and at the time of writing this post am only 3 episodes in (it's 64 episodes in total), but other than totally breaking down 7 minutes into the first episode because Hughes showed up (fans of the show will relate to my emotional break down), I already have found something that I didn't see before.

Queue the emotional breaking down

You see, this show is about two brothers who live in a world where alchemy is predominant. Alchemy in this world allows one to use energy as a means to transform/rearrange something on a chemical level. The main law that must be obeyed is that of equivalent exchange; to obtain something, something of equal value must be given. This allows an alchemist to transform various objects into something radically different and to use it for a different use.

Ed transmuted a spear from the ground

At the very young age of 12, these two brothers stumble into their father's study and learn how to do alchemy. In the same year when they made this great advancement, an epidemic hit their town and their mother passed away. Struck by grief these boys make the decision to use their new found alchemy to commit the greatest alchemic taboo: to resurrect the dead. Ultimately, when they attempt to do so, it doesn't work (surprise surprise). But just from having attempted this, these brothers fall victim to the law of equivalent exchange, the younger brother Alphonse (lol I share a name with him) loses his whole physical body, and the older brother Edward loses his left leg. Determined not to lose his brother forever, Ed uses alchemy again to trade his right arm for his brother's soul (don't even ask me how that is an equal trade, idk). And now these brothers having realized human transmutation is a bad idea have abandoned that goal and seek out a way to retrieve Ed's limbs and Al's body... Ok Alphonse, thanks for trying to sell the show to me (which if I did successfully, you should go and watch it), but what does this have to do with companionship and ultimately the Catholic Christian's way of life?

Recently, two prominent priests in my life have be reassigned to ministries that would take them far away. This means that they would be leaving the wonderful community that they built up behind. But one of the priests in his farewell speech exhorted us to value community; that in fact salvation is only ever received in a community. It was never intended for us to receive individually and in isolation. It was intended for all the people of God. Furthermore, we must concern ourselves with all of our neighbour's reception of salvation; we need to care for our neighbours. It was truly an eye opening and powerful message.

Ed and Al look so defeated

What is significant about Ed's story in particular, is that his story highlights the importance of a strong community in the life of a Catholic Christian. In his story, Ed was greeted by grief. He lost his mother. Someone who was so close to him, and at the age of 12 he probably couldn't even fathom the full reality and consequences of such a loss. Then, he made a bad decision to misuse his gifts (alchemy) in a way he knew that he wasn't supposed to. He decided to stray from the right path in pursuit of a desire far off in the distance. As he left his life behind he arrived at the pinnacle of his journey into the darkness and he paid greatly for it: he lost his left leg and right arm.

Now, in literature it is important for us to note the significance of such a loss. What is special about the arm is not its function but its members, specifically, the fingers as a part of the arm. Our fingers contain the uniqueness of who we are because our fingers prints are uniquely our own. Our legs serve a very simple function: they transport us. They physically aid us in walking from one point to another. They help us move forward. For Ed, he had completely lost who he was and his way to move forward.

Ooouuuu deep. Thank you thank you. But that's not where his story ends, far from it. Upon a visit from Colonel Mustang, Ed is offered hope in the form of an offer to become a state alchemist. This would allow him access to an immense amount of resources to conduct research of any kind, even research on how to retrieve his own limbs and Al's body. Inspired by this Ed asks his friend, Winry, and her grandma, Pinako (these are close family friends) to give him a prosthetic arm and leg that are both made of metal (in this world, these prosthetics are called automail). After doing the surgery, he pursues becoming a state alchemist.

Well... thats a pretty decent summary of the first two episodes if I do say so myself, but what did we learn? Well, a lot actually:

1. Grief will come - In this life, we are not guaranteed many things, but some of the things I think we are guaranteed is grief, struggling, hurt, pain, you get the point. We will essentially experience the natural consequences of original sin. Sometimes, however, we don't "take it like a champ"; sometimes we actually fall deeper and deeper into sin and despair. Then what?
2. Community is our lifeline to God - Let me first say that God is ever merciful; He loves us, and readily makes Himself available and accessible to us; the fault lies with us and our brokenness. But in those times that we have strayed so far from God that we can't see Him, what do we do? When it seems like God is on one end of the spectrum and we somehow have travelled to the very opposite end, what do we do?  Well, there are also others who are journeying, or who have journeyed along the journey of life. These people can be our intermediaries to God; through them we can still see and experience Christ. The easiest to identify examples of these are the saints, but you know, living in the fallen physical world, it is sometimes hard for us to really connect with them (again the fault lies with us and our broken nature). But good news, there are people who are closer to us who can be like Christ to us: our brothers and sisters! Winry, Pinako, Al, Mustang were all a part of Ed's community. In fact, they gave him what he had lost: an arm and a leg (lol). But more importantly, they helped him remember who he was (he got his identity back), and they gave him a way to move forward (he got a leg).

   

   They're so kawaii =')

3. We are not meant to be on life support from our community forever - In fact, we are meant to also, at times, be the doctors supporting others in our community. But that aside, I want to make sure to point out that while Ed was reminded of who he was by those around him, he has to claim his identity for himself; he has to embark on his journey of self-discovery. While he was given a leg to walk on; he and those around him don't undermine the importance of getting back up onto his own legs one day. These prosthetics, while functionally do the job, they are not naturally compatible with him. Community can be our lifeline to God, but we are not meant to be on life support forever, God calls us to a state of life better than that.

"As Catholic Christians we are called into community. Ultimately, even in heaven, we are called into community: a communion of saints. Life is difficult but do not forget your friends. Sometimes the struggle may be to stay within your community. To that I say, struggle. It is well worth the struggle if you can keep close to you those friends who will keep you close to God. If you're at a point in your life where you don't have that kind of community around you, it's time to find one. It's time to step out of the darkness and bask in the light of Christ through our brothers and sisters." (kinda paraphrased from Father Carlos...)

...And with that, may God be praised!

P.S. If you enjoy Fullmetal Alchemist and you liked this post then stay tuned! I definitely hope to be able to write more about this anime as I rewatch it!